Once upon a time: I went to the pet store to pick up some necessities for our then 1 year old and 3 month old cats. I picked up some treats, a little bed, a toy or two, another cat, and some food. Bill was not so thrilled with the 4th item on that list so I was henceforth banned from ever setting foot in any sort of pet store without proper supervision.
Present day: Bill and I went to the mall to go Easter dress shopping for Rowan and came back with an Easter dress, a matching sweater, hair bows, a MacBook, an iPod touch, and a swimsuit for Keaton. That was kind of an expensive trip so now we need someone to volunteer to supervise us both when we come within a 5 mile radius of an Apple store. At least the new computer won’t remind us to avoid impulse purchases by peeing on everything we own (like a certain cat we had).
Ever since the new MacBook Pro commercials have been airing (17 In! 8 hour Battery! It’s Green- when you buy this you SAVE PLANET EARTH!) I’ve been purposefully changing the channel because oh they are so shiny and pretty and I bet they won’t mysteriously shut down and the programs won’t crash mid-use like this stupid old MacBook, which is 6 years old. That’s like thousands of years old in computer years. My computer probably built Stonehenge.
I knew it was getting to me though. That clean, simple Mac marketing always lures me in but this one shot straight through my logical neuro-receptors (the kind that had earmarked Bill’s freelance $ to pay down really old credit card debt) and directly stabbed my impulse But I Waaaaaant It receptors. And we all know which one won. We didn’t go with the Pro though. It was hugely out of our price range and though it was shiny and pretty it was also gigantic, not what I personally was looking for in a laptop. So we decided on the macbook and the iPod because sadly our current iPod, (which probably helped with the construction of the pyramids) had pretty much bit the dust. For the record I just wanted a nano but Bill couldn’t download Mr T sayings or use it as a lightsabor so, you know, we HAD to to get the iPod touch.
I used to be one of the normal people who regularly thought What is with those Mac people anyway, I swear it’s like a cult. Get off your computer and out into the real live world you geek-asses. Then I started dating one of those geek-asses and I just accepted that that was a part of him I would have to overlook. After we moved in together this got harder and harder and then he made me do it. He MADE me buy a MacBook (Stonehenge). I spent the better part of the first year complaining about how different it was from a PC. Example: Why did they do that? Just to be different? I hate Steve Jobs. I bet Steve Jobs kills puppies and whips unicorns and Oh my god I screwed up my paper, it must be because this is a Mac even though I am using Microsoft Word for this and am kind of an idiot, and I can’t believe you MADE me buy this thing. Bill lost his patience with me more than a few times but eventually I came around and now PCs are like a foreign language to me. I don’t get them.
So now I am officially an Apple Snob and I’m sorry world I know you wanted better of me but lord I can NOT help myself (Clearly exemplified by the aforementioned purchases). (And the little Apple sticker I made Bill put on my car). Oh my God I am a giant geek-ass.